Why Lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren't prepared for the worst answer.

 
In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his
first witness to the stand. The witness was a grand  motherly, elderly
woman.
He approached her and asked, "Mrs.Jones, do you  know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams.I've know you
since you were a young boy,and frankly, you've been a big
disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate
people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big
shot  when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to
anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you. "
The Lawyer was  stunned.
Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room  and ! asked,
"Mrs. Jones. do you know the defense attorney?"
She again  replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr.Bradley since he was
a youngster,  too. He's lazy, bigoted and he has a drinking problem.
He can't build a  normal relationship with anyone and his law practice
is one of the worst in  the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on
his wife with three  different women, one of them was your wife.  Yes,
I know him."
The  defense attorney almost died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach  the bench, and in a very
quiet voice, said, "If either of you bastards  asks her if she knows
me, I'll throw you in jail for  contempt."