Thursday, June 28, 2007

Top 10 Languages Spoken in the World !!


The top 10 languages spoken in the world

10. French -- Number of speakers: 129 million

Often called the most romantic language in the world, French is spoken in tons of countries, including Belgium, Canada , Rwanda, Cameroon, and Haiti. Oh, and France too. We're actually very lucky that French is so popular, because without it, we might have been stuck with Dutch Toast, Dutch Fries, and Dutch kissing (ew!).

To say "hello" in French, say "Bonjour" (bone-JOOR).

9. Malay—Indonesian Number of speakers: 159 million

Malay-Indonesian is spoken - surprise - in Malaysia and Indonesia. Actually, we kinda fudged the numbers on this one because there are many dialects of Malay, the most popular of which is Indonesian. But they're all pretty much based on the same root language, which makes it the ninth most-spoken in the world.Indonesia is a fascinating place; a nation made up of over 13,000 islands it is the sixth most populated country in the world. Malaysia borders on two of the larger parts of Indonesia (including the island of Borneo), and is mostly known for its capital city of Kuala Lumpur.

To say "hello" in Indonesian, say "Selamat pagi" (se-LA-maht PA-gee).

8. Portuguese -- Number of speakers: 191 million

Think of Portuguese as the little language that could. In the 12th Century, Portugal won its independence from Spain and expanded all over the world with the help of its famous explorers like Vasco da Gama and Prince Henry the Navigator. (Good thing Henry became a navigator . . . could you imagine if a guy named "Prince Henry the Navigator" became a florist?) Because Portugal got in so early on the exploring game, the language established itself all over the world, especially in Brazil (where it's the national language), Macau, Angola, Venezuela, and Mozambique.

To say "hello" in Portuguese, say "Bom dia" (bohn DEE-ah).

7. Bengali -- Number of speakers: 211 million

In Bangladesh, a country of 120+ million people, just about everybody speaks Bengali. And because Bangladesh is virtually surrounded by India (where the population is growing so fast, just breathing the air can get you pregnant), the number of Bengali speakers in the world is much higher than most people would expect.

To say "hello" in Bengali, say "Ei Je" (EYE-jay).

6. Arabic -- Number of speakers: 246 million

Arabic, one of the world's oldest languages, is spoken in the Middle East, with speakers found in countries such as Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, Iraq, Syria, Jordan, Lebanon, and Egypt. Furthermore, because Arabic is the language of the Koran, millions of Moslems in other countries speak Arabic as well. So many people have a working knowledge of Arabic, in fact, that in 1974 it was made the sixth official language of the United Nations.

To say "hello" in Arabic, say "Al salaam a'alaykum" (Ahl sah-LAHM ah ah-LAY-koom) .

5. Russian -- Number of speakers: 277 million

Mikhail Gorbachev, Boris Yeltsin, and Yakov Smirnoff are among the millions of Russian speakers out there. Sure, we used to think of them as our Commie enemies. Now we think of them as our Commie friends. One of the six languages in the UN, Russian is spoken not only in the Mother Country, but also in Belarus, Kazakhstan, and the U.S. (to name just a few places).
To say "hello" in Russian, say "Zdravstvuite" (ZDRAST-vet- yah).

4. Spanish -- Number of speakers: 392 million

Aside from all of those kids who take it in high school, Spanish is spoken in just about every South American and Central American country, not to mention Spain, Cuba, and the U.S. There is a particular interest in Spanish in the U.S., as many English words are borrowed from the language, including: tornado, bonanza, patio, quesadilla, enchilada, and taco grande supreme.

To say "hello" in Spanish, say "Hola" (OH-la).

3. Hindustani -- Number of speakers: 497 million

Hindustani is the primary language of India's crowded population, and it encompasses a huge number of dialects (of which the most commonly spoken is Hindi). While many predict that the population of India will soon surpass that of China, the prominence of English in India prevents Hindustani from surpassing the most popular language in the world. If you're interested in learning a little Hindi, there's a very easy way: rent an Indian movie. The film industry in India is the most prolific in the world, making thousands of action/romance/ musicals every year.

To say "hello" in Hindustani, say "Namaste" (Nah-MAH-stay) .

2. English -- Number of speakers: 508 million

While English doesn't have the most speakers, it is the official language of more countries than any other language. Its speakers hail from all around the world, including the U.S., Australia, England, Zimbabwe, the Caribbean, Hong Kong, South Africa, and Canada. We'd tell you more about English, but you probably feel pretty comfortable with the language already. Let's just move on to the most popular language in the world.

To say "hello" in English, say "What's up, freak?" (watz-UP-freek) .

1. Mandarin -- Number of speakers: 1 billion+

Surprise, surprise, the most widely spoken language on the planet is based in the most populated country on the planet, China. Beating second-place English by a 2 to 1 ratio, but don't let that lull you into thinking that Mandarin is easy to learn. Speaking Mandarin can be really tough, because each word can be pronounced in four ways (or "tones"), and a beginner will invariably have trouble distinguishing one tone from another. But if over a billion people could do it, so could you. Try saying hello!

To say "hello" in Mandarin, say "Ni hao" (Nee HaOW). ("Hao" is pronounced as one syllable, but the tone requires that you let your voice drop midway, and then raise it again at the end.)

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Re: [LIKELY JUNK]Re: [LIKELY JUNK]Ab meri baari.

Torrential rainstorms were knocking down power lines all over town.
That meant, as a customer service represetative for the electric
company, I was dispatching repairmen right and left.

When one lineman called a customer to get her exact address, he was
told, "I'm at Post Office Box 99."

The weary lineman replied, "Ma'am, I'll be coming to you in a truck,
not in an envelope."

Re: [LIKELY JUNK]Re: [LIKELY JUNK]Ab meri baari.

A woman comes home and tells her husband, "Remember those headaches I've been having
all these years? Well, they're gone." "No more headaches?" the husband asks, "What happened?"
His wife replies, "Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to stand in front of a
mirror, stare at myself and repeat 'I do not have a headache; I do not have a headache, I do not have a headache.' It worked! The
headaches are all gone."

The husband replies, "Well, that is wonderful." His wife then says, "You know, you haven't
been exactly a ball of fire in the bedroom these last few years. Why don't you go see the
hypnotist and see if he can do anything for that?" The husband agrees to try it.

Following his appointment, the husband comes home, rips off his clothes, picks up his wife and
carries her into the bedroom. He puts her on the bed and says, "Don't move, I'll be right back." He goes into the bathroom and comes back a few minutes later and jumps into bed and makes passionate love to his wife like never before.

His wife says, "Boy, that was wonderful!" The husband says, "Don't move! I will be right
back." He goes back into the bathroom, comes back and round two was even better than the first time. The wife sits up and her head is spinning. Her husband again says, "Don't move, I'll be right back."

This time, his wife quietly follows him and there, in the
bathroom, she sees him standing at the mirror and saying, "She's not my wife. She's not my wife.
She's not my wife!"

Re: [LIKELY JUNK]Re: [LIKELY JUNK]Ab meri baari.

GOD LOVES BLONDES ANYWAY

A blonde finds herself in serious trouble. Her business has gone bust and she's in dire financial straits.  She's so desperate that she decides to ask God for help.

She begins to pray..."God, please help me. I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well. Please let me win the lotto."

Lotto night comes, and somebody else wins it.

She again prays... "God, please let me win the lotto!  I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well." Lotto night comes and she still has no luck. Once again, she prays.

"My God, why have You forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house, and my car. My children are starving. I don't often ask You for help, and I have always been a good servant to You.  PLEASE let me win the lotto just this one time so I can get my life back in order."

Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open. The blonde is overwhelmed by the Voice of God Himself...

"Sweetheart, work with Me on this... Buy a ticket."

Re: [LIKELY JUNK]Re: [LIKELY JUNK]Ab meri baari.

Sardar Banta Singh went to the emergency room with  
the tip of his index finger blown off.

"How did this happen?" the doctor asked.

"Well I was trying to commit suicide," Banta Singh
replied.

The doctor asked, "Trying to commit suicide by
shooting your finger?"

"No, silly! First I put the gun on my head and I 
thought my face would    look horrible, then I put it
in my mouth and I thought I just paid Rs. 1,000 to get
my teeth straightened. So then I put the gun in my ear
and I thought this is going to make a loud noise, so
I put my finger in my other ear before I pulled the
trigger.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Dont mess with woman


A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt.

After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So you're a man, That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days".

Flattered, the man replied, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely! "This must be a sign from God!"

The woman continued, "and look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune."

Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement,
opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman.

The woman takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap back on, and hands
it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"

The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police

Bheja Fry questions.

  • If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
  • When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
  • Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
  • If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
  • If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea does that mean the fifth one enjoys it?
  • If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
  • If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?
  • If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
  • Whats a question with no answer called?
  • Why is a square meal served on round plates?
  • Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up 10 times every hour?
  • If mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?
  • Why is Charlie short for Charles if they are both the same number of letters?
  • How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
  • Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
  • If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
  • Can you cry under water?
  • If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?